ANTS ON A LOG: PUBLISHED IN A GROUP OF NEWSPAPERS

ANTS ON A LOG

We were excited. We were flying out to L.A. We were going to be there in time for our seven-year-old- granddaughter’s graduation. Finleigh was graduating from first  grade. We knew how proud she was by our last Face Time with her.

 However, before one goes anywhere one has to pack. Packing is not pretty.   The objective should be to take as little as possible. A goal never reached! I know that I need a bag -packing app watching my every article that I place carefully in my suitcase. I need one that will not hesitate to scream, “Are you kidding me? You don’t need that! You already have packed seven pairs of underpants. No, you don’t need the purple pair. You said you are staying for one week. One week is seven days. We don’t pack for your, “Just in case.” We pack for seven days! Two pairs of dress pants is more than enough, and one dress shirt.” But no such apps were available. When I handed my bag to the Avis shuttle driver, she definitely had the right to holler, “Are you trying to kill me?”

  We arrived Thursday evening at the hotel L.A. time about 11:PM. Boston time 2:00 A.M. Still we were at Finleigh’s school the next morning at 9:30. There would be playtime for the children and potluck. I was very hungry, but I had to remind myself  this would be California food. There was a huge platter of hummus. I have issues with chickpeas, so not for me. What on earth is on the next platter? I recognize the celery, but what is it possibly stuffed with? How to best describe it? It was brownish color with little black dots on top of the brown spread.

   I inquired, “ What is that?” as I pointed hesitatingly at the celery with brown stuffing.

“ Oh that’s organic peanut butter and the dots are raisins, smiled Finleigh.

 “What’s that called?” I asked.

 “It’s called Ants on a Log,” Finleigh answered as if to say, “ I’ve got a lot to teach you,  Grandpa?”

 “Sounds delicious especially the ants parts.” I offered.

  Anyway, I’m a nut for peanut butter.  I wondered about the organic. What would make this peanut butter more organic than the no sodium brand I buy? But I already had asked enough stupid questions.  Now I thought for a few seconds about the rasins.. I’m not crazy about raisins. However, as mentioned before I was very hungry. I took one stalk.“Not bad.” I reached for two more.  By the time they closed the brunch I had eaten half the platter. No one else had any interest in the Ants. They were all hummus people. When we get home I’ll bring this specialty to our next party. I can’t wait till they ask, “What do you call this?”  

 The rest of the week was spent picking up Finleigh from her various activities. Each evening Finleigh insisted on ten jokes.

 My first favorite was the teacher asks Johnny ,“How do you spell the country called Colombia?”

 Johnny spells it K-o-l-u-m- b-i-a.

“Incorrect,” says the teacher.

Johnny replies, “But you asked how I spell it.”

 My second favorite was Johnny is asked if he says his prayers before dinner?

 Johnny responds, “ No, my mom is a great cook.”

 Finleigh sighed, “Grandpa did you say your prayers before you ate the Ants on a Log?”

 Soon it was time to pack again.  Now I definitely could use a packing app. What could be more embarrassing than the hotel calling me and asking if I had left a pair of purple underpants in the drawer.